INTRODUCTION

A safe space is a place you have created in your mind and emotional body, where you feel loved, safe and protected. Before healing painful or traumatic emotions, it’s important to ground in a safe space.

Accessing your safe space will give you solid emotional ground to stand on as you witness emotional wounds. It accelerates your self-healing process by making it easier to soothe feelings of hurt, fear or pain. Taking the time to create (or deepen) a safe space is an act of self-love.

Note: While all self-love levels will benefit from the Safe Space exercise, the lower you are on the self-love spectrum, the more time you we recommend you dedicate to creating safety in your mind and body, before your healing journey. 

IMPORTANCE

Emotional safety in the body is the place from which we can heal. If we try to face our shadows or heal trauma, without a strong anchoring in the body, we can easily feel overwhelmed or taken over by emotional pain. 

A great metaphor for this is a tree blowing over in a storm, because it didn't have strong roots. Having an embodied sense of emotional safety gives you strong roots to weather the storms of painful memories or experiences. As you anchor in the knowing you are and will be okay now, the emotional storm can and will pass without knocking you off centre. In this way, grounding into a safe space is foundational to learning emotional regulation.

We're going to set you up properly to begin your healing journey, so you have the inner resources to reach for safety and calm whenever you need it. 

Facing and embracing your shadows is not a matter of simply sitting with emotional pain. It involves maintaining a positive inward emotional connection to safety, warmth and love whilst witnessing pain. These good feelings are then shared with the pain, to help alleviate it. Old wounds are skillfully dissolved (more on this in Empathy Heals Level 1 and 2).

To prepare you for emotional regulation as such, we are going to help your body learn a warm safe feeling, so you can heal pain from it. 

PREPARATION

Journal your answers to the following questions:

• What would you say to a child who was scared and didn’t know they deserved to be loved and protected?

• Are you willing to say those same words to any part of you that feels scared, and undeserving of love and protection? Could you tell these parts, “It is your birthright to be loved and protected, and I will make sure this happens for you?” If yes, reflect on how it feels to do so. What emotions come up? Is there fear or uncertainty? Does it feel possible or true?

INSTRUCTIONS

Listen to the meditations below to create the feeling of physical and emotional safety.

During the meditations, focus your attention fully on the physical feeling of warmth and safety. We're going to help you learn this sensation through a gentle cupping of your hands over the eyes throughout the meditation.

Once your body knows and trusts this feeling of physical and emotional safety, you'll have a tangible anchor point to heal from. From this place in your body, you can stand strong and offer love to yourself when fear or protection rear up. We are laying the foundation for self-soothing practices, and in turn, self-healing.

If you’re new to creating a safe space, please review the meditation tips below prior to your journey.

TIPS

As you listen to the meditations, your defence mechanisms or ego may activate and say, “Don’t feel," or "You're not safe here.” This is because they are remembering all the times you didn't feel safe in your life.

If this happens, we are so sorry that you didn't feel safe on Earth. That is sad and you deserve to feel safe. We are going to help you learn this.

To regain your focus, take a few deep breaths and everything to slow down. Claim that you absolutely deserve to feel safe now. Feel this as true in every cell of your body. Then, thank your mind for trying to protect you, as it just wants you to be okay. You can love this part of yourself. Know that your ego (or defence mechanisms) have a limited capacity to help you because they are only looking backwards in time. They are not seeing all possibilities for you right now, which include being safe. We must train your mind, through focus and repetition, to believe safety is possible in the now, regardless of past experiences.

Note: For deep trauma processing and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, we recommend Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) therapy to help establish a safe space.

MEDITATION

Get comfortable in a private space, plug in your headphones, take a deep breath and press play. After the prompt, cup your hands over your eyes for as long as it feels good to do so.

Rest + Reflect

Great job! Rest for a few minutes and grab some water. Then, check in with your body:

• How is it feeling?

• Do you notice any differences after completing the exercise?

BONUS AFFIRMATION

I am safe, here and now. I am grounded. I keep myself safe in all situations. I know how to love and protect myself. I am eternally loved and protected. I feel this deep in my heart.

Repeat the following 10 times aloud, ideally when looking yourself in the mirror. Then, reflect: how did saying these words make you feel?

Modification:

If it feels too hard to say the affirmation, start with: "I can be safe, here and now. I can be grounded. I might be able to keep myself safe in all situations. I can learn how to love and protect myself. It's possible to always be loved and protected. I can feel this deep in my heart." Once you're comfortable with this scaled-down version, repeat the first one.